Our Holographic Selves

This evening, I wanted to order pizza from Domino's. The only economic deal they really have involves order 3 pizzas. Now I wouldn't just order that much without people to eat it with, so I was thinking about who I could call over to just chill, eat pizza, and maybe watch a movie. I was taken aback by the realization that locally there are so few people I could call who would be unpretentious company. By unpretentious, I mean people who you can just be around and not feel like you have to be somebody – or rather, uphold some image. When did culture become so superficial, shallow, and dare I even say political? I am not removed from this judgment at all, but am merely observing this phenomenon. Why do we project such holographic personalities as interactive facades when our real, 3D selves are readily available? I don't even think it's a matter of choice for the most part, as it's become second nature and ingrained into our consciousness. Why is it so rare, at least it seems to me, to acquire company who doesn't judge, but just let's you be without discrimination? That's why I love occasionally indulging in weed and the one time I did shrooms. It allowed me to consciously become that person who doesn't judge – to accept those I was with for who they presented themselves to be – and be completely tranquil with my surroundings. But why should it take a substance to initiate this frame of mind? Humans are vastly capable beings with boundless aptitude for all things. Because of this great potential, we have yoked ourselves toward projecting illusory selves and other inauthentic activity. You may notice that it is often the "slow" kids – who are often made fun of – who are the most genuine beings, barring no pretension in their words or deeds. I refuse to believe such a disposition to be a lesser form of humanity. Just as the innocence and imaginations of children should be heeded for their inherent worth, so too do I think we should take note or the proclivity of those we regard as mentally challenged. We cannot afford to be so arrogant as to baselessly condescend anyone at all. Each of us has inherent worth and consequently something – if not a multitude of things – to offer society and one's fellow man, no matter how minuscule the impact.

Returning to the initial inquiry, I think that we conduct ourselves with such pretension (notice the word 'pretend' seems innate inside pretension) because we fear that our true selves will be judged, and worse, shunned and rejected for falling short of another's expectations. The reach of our insecurities, whether realized or subconscious, is far and wide – successfully internalized and pervasive enough to parasitically dictate our every action and reaction when considering its intended effect on others. What is it to know someone? To penetrate the protective guise that we purport, I think, and come to understand the motives of one's actions – that might be called knowledge of another. Knowledge of self is a whole separate matter. Few people, it seems, are reflective enough to observe their own maya, and fewer still adept enough to change it or cast off the veil of illusion. Not everyone is ready to be unplugged; this is true. Most are so hopelessly dominated by their own sense of purpose – the mere sugar coating over the self-infatuated bullshit in which they live – that to 'unplug' them would only unsettle them into a begrudging, fruitless existence.

There is no conclusion that I have reached here, only extrapolating the observation that we are unnecessarily convoluted beings who grapple with our sense of self by seeking authenticity and acceptance therein and without.